2010 Velveeta Commercial

Letter to Eric Besson Judas Iscariot

proposal for accession to the Committee of Great sycophants.



Son

the top of the branch where I continue to play scales, I am sending you this brief exordium which will tell you, better than an editorial Ivan Rioufol, hopes that inspires us your early path in this valley of dross.

When I say "we", I include all those who joined, over time, the Committee that I have the honor to chair, which is the smallest of things because I financed my own money - so to say.

With its founding motto (*), his totem Scout (**) and his four evangelical missions (***), this small club open only to champions of the Discipline Committee shall meet annually in the utmost discretion award its Golden Kiss.

Each of us has carved his name in the history of this great challenge, which the trophy was molded to my own lips in reference to my founding gesture in the Garden of Olives. The poll carried ballot rigging, as part of a world food gluttony which illustrated our vocation to eat all the racks. Brutus, this rude fellow, we replays the scene in the Senate, Iago, my proud lieutenant, splits a demonstration of wild rice, buckwheat Ganelon sounds the anthem, the few Borgia whose poison has not yet come to praise the end in mind family, and Salans Challe play I want-you-you-want-me, while Zeller and Jouhaud train to rechange their minds. Little Jacques Doriot wonders whether it is time to reinvest the left, the young Philippe Val listening from Europe 1, Jean-Luc Hess has his back turned and the butler Liliane Bettencourt described his hut on Island Arros.

postprandial Our deliberations begin a mini-conference on a particular act of deception, denial, denial, abandonment of position, about face, forfeiture or other unfair behavior that illuminated the history of mankind. No sector is taboo: we discuss the defection of Soviet dissidents with the same scrupulous critical leaks cloakroom eleven France; boastfulness of Bazaine is reassessed regularly while the deviousness of cutesy Lancelot Lake periodically raises skeptical indictments.

Then comes the argument. Each member of the Committee of Great sycophants who testified, in time, a record of consistent and co-optation argued, then has a few minutes to sing the treachery of his candidate, extolling his Jesuitism demonstrate his lack of shame and try to establish indépassabilité its deceit. He must have heard Fouche boast moral and ductility of Jugurtha and Talleyrand conducted the eulogy of General Tapioca!

That year, Nicolas S. (****), One of our members the most abled since already won the Golden Kiss twice (1983 and 1995), which was the most persuasive. Using all the tricks of the legalese, what we have experienced rhetorician painted a portrait of you extremely positive in terms of villainy and papelardise - our two basic criteria. He has an enthusiasm of rally driver to describe your journey hairpin and a precision of London tailor to explain your fondness for patronage reversible. He ginned anecdotes attesting to your mastery of intrigue and maneuver your virtuosity. Short, he convinced us to consider you eligible for our sulfur Areopagus!

I address to you then, as required by our protocol, the questionnaire called "Jarnac" in asking him to inform you as soon as possible, so as to validate your admission, and we can program the little plot of induction that we dedicate to each new entrant.

I'll also enclose a press release on the news of our Committee.

May the spirit of Gethsemane spread on your house principle hometown and sweet scents.


Judas Iscariot
pcc Grumpy



(*) and villainy Papelardise!
(**) (***) The Weathervane sly
Spreading doublespeak, rehabilitate apostasy, promote perjury and distinguish Escobar. Members
(****) CGS who are still alive if they wish to enjoy a right of anonymity. __________________




APPENDICES Appendix 1



QUESTIONNAIRE JARNAC

1 - You have a choice between going to London to eat corned beef for four years and enjoy a suite at the Hotel Lutetia during same period.
 I leave my country loose.
 I bring myself to leave my two-room kitchen, not without the sublet to a family antique.

2 - A woman abandons you covet earnestly on your shoulder while you confident that it feeds the doubts about the loyalty his companion, who happens to be your best friend.
 I still afflicts more by calling her paranoid.  I
values by paying tribute to his foresight.

3 - You have access to the plans of the Rafale and the government of North Korea offers you one hundred million euros. 
My moral code forbids me to accept as much money for a camera so controversial.
 I agree to not arouse the wrath of a great country against France.

4 - You are a professional cyclist, one day in the locker room, the leader of your team admits to having had strawberries before Tagada departure from Paris-Roubaix.
 I keep the secret, thus taking the risk that the scandal reflects on the entire team at the next inspection.
 I save the honor of my class by falsifying the signature of my teammate at the bottom of the confession that I address to the editor of L'Équipe.

5 - You're the grand vizier, and you walk in the desert with the caliph when he is bitten by a cobra.
 I take the risk of aggravating the situation by sucking the venom in defiance of all prophylactic protocols.  I install
comfortably in the sun my companion and I start looking for a phone booth to alert the poison control center.

6 - You have just discovered a treasure in the company of your partner when he committed suicide by requiring you to remit his share to the Little Sisters of the Poor.
 I bring myself to these brave women to inflict guilt that is sure to overwhelm them when they know that prosperity is attributable to an act of sacrilege.
 I am charitable decision to spare them the moral weight.

7 - You are cumulatively co-signatory of the Treaty of Versailles and the Nazi-Soviet pact but fate invites you to participate in a great collective.
 I stick in a wait-and pusillanimous. 
J'envahis Poland.


Appendix 2


Press

NOT THE ABOLITION OF THE DUPLICITY ON PUBLIC SERVICE!

Considering:

First,

That television has supplanted the Song of Roland, the Elizabethan theater and the letter of termination to the service of transmission of values,

That the notion of a basket of crabs, if she is entitled to the relevant illustrations in most industries, has rarely found to flourish with much happiness as in pharmacies of the media industry;

What heroes who have brought the world the true nature of Chantal Goya, the killings of William Leymergie inclinations, neuroses hidden Christophe Hondelatte, addictive practices of Jean-Luc Delarue and prevarication Christine Ockrent do not deserve to see their deeds stored in the same drawer that the interview with Fidel Castro and the biography of Ernest Hemingway;

And, secondly,

That some, adorning themselves with 'virtuous quibbles, intend to stop oday's Duplicity on satellite-funded national effort, the Committee

Great sycophants calls on the people of phonies, renegades, covenant breakers, apostates, entortilleurs, forgers, con artists, the defrocked, of collaboration, neighborhood snitches, spies, industrialists, makers of children in the back and throwers smokescreen to defend freedom of Betrayal by sending an anonymous letter of disapproval to the Higher Audiovisual Council.

Papelardise and villainy!